Serendipity

I'd like to let everyone know that Sabrina Leavens has been found alive and well. I know little else other than she said on her FB page that she just needed some time to herself. Thank you all!  I normally don't do this but I have known this young lady a long time and she's a long time friend to my son, Shawn (Campbell). She is a wife and mother... Please share far and wide...she's been missing for too long.  Thank you!

You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track. Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence. Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition. Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand. If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm. The attention span of a computer is only as long as it electrical cord. An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing. Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure. All great discoveries are made by mista...

Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a  London  hotel's staff and one of its guests.  The London hotel involved  submitted this to the Sunday Times. WHAT TO DO WITH ALL THOSE "FREE" SOAPS WHEN TRAVELLING ****************************************************** Dear Maid, Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial.  Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish.  They are in my way.  Thank you, S. Berman ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Dear Room 635, I am not your regular maid.  She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from her day off.  I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you requested.  The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top ...

1. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. 2. Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative. 3. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me. 4. I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast. 5. Sign in a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea..." 6. I live in my own little world. But it's OK. They know me here. 7. I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner. 8. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? 9. I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected. 10. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead's. 11. I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. 12. I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore, I am perfect. 13. Everyday I beat m...

I promise you cannot read these and not laugh out loud! These are real notes written from parents in a Mississippi school district. (Spellings have been left intact.) **************************************************************** My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot. Dear School: Please ekscuse John Henry being absent on  Jan. 28 , 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33 Please excuse Gloria Jean from Jim today. She is administrating Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face. Carlos was absent yesterday because he playing football. He hurt in the growing part. Ethel Pearl could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins. Please xcuse LeRoy from school, he ain't got no rain cot and it was missing rain. ...