Serendipity

1.  Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2.  Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3.  If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4.  If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5.  Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6.  Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? 7.  Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? 8.  Why do "tug" boats push their barges? 9.  Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there? 10.  Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting? 11.  Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? 12.  Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? 13.  Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites? 14.  Why do "overlook" and "oversee" m...

Definition:  Pun: a joke exploiting the different possible meanings of a word or the fact that there are words which sound alike but have different meanings. «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» «»«» I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It's syncing now. Jokes  about  German sausage are the wurst. A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time. How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me. This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down. I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations. I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me. ...

In light of Hurricane Sandy's impending landfall...I thought I'd steal a moment and and lighten the mood with these headline gaffes! Enjoy! * Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers * British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands * Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms * Eye Drops off Shelf * Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead * Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim * Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 * Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax * Stolen Painting Found by Tree * Checkout Counter Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years * Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One * Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 * If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While * Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures * Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge * Deer Kill 17,000 * Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead * Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge * New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Te...

Lexiphile is a lover of words; one who is fascinated by words and language. Example of a lexiphile's play : A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. Read on : To write with a broken pencil is pointless. When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground. The batteries were given out free of charge. A will is a dead giveaway. If you don't pay your exorcist, you can get repossessed. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.. A boiled egg is hard to beat. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut ...