Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The Move

I've spent the last few weeks, packing a few boxes a day, sorting things between my daughter and I...splitting stuff that was purchased together to prepare for my move to Wisconsin.  And I am happy to say that the packing is almost done!  Tomorrow we load the uHaul truck and Thursday morning, I am heading off to a new life and new adventure.

There was a time in my life that I was a big risk-taker...I didn't hesitate to take a leap of faith and just go for it.  As I entered motherhood, and being a wife that changed...it was no longer necessary to act quite so impulsively.  (That's not saying that this move is impulsive...it's been carefully planned over the last couple of months!) I quit taking risks, and settled into a life of just going with the flow that life was taking me...whether I liked it or not.

Then, having the nervous breakdown in 2001...well, I didn't welcome any kind of changes, hated even having my routine broke up...let alone taking any form of risks...I was too afraid.  But having met the man I will be sharing my life and future with, he broke through that wall of fear and gave me back to myself...something that I have needed and couldn't do (or find) on my own.

I know that this is not a cure for my depression, but it will certainly help lessen it so that the down days will come less often.  I am still dependent on my happy pills though...without them, I still cry too easily over what is really petty things, and I also have learned my antidepressants help me focus better and I am a much calmer person over-all.

With this move though, comes an adjustment that I am hoping will pass somewhat easily mentally and emotionally...that being having spent the last 9 years living with my 3 grand-children from the moment they were born...leaving them and living a daily life without them is going to be a change that is necessary.  For them...and for me.  We have become far too co-dependent on each other, which for me isn't (and hasn't been) a good thing...not really.

As I begin my new journey and new life, I will be taking pictures along the way, and my next blog entry will detail my travels to my new home in Wisconsin....so...stay tuned!

And as always...thanks for reading!  8 )

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